mourning further heavens

paradigm shift
drat that whore
never knocked
on my door
i went from
the sofa to
the bed to
the floor moving
one place
to the other
but the mother
won't budge
or i am there
and she is
one step ahead
shape shifter
new places enter
my dreams i
dream of new places
she in between
i hugging her sides
i dive right in and
am hung out to dry
what alters in my eyes
is the rate
of their blinking



topics for
moving stories
i could narrate one
from the side of a field
and another in the motions of
a somersault into a progressive age going backwards
plus in the crossing of a bridge joined and sundered
in the late afternoon it thundered she cried they split open the skies
there is one on the terrace soaking up rain and laying the blame
on the city oh how it gets flooded but dont you know there is enough droughts
how at the foothills bright green thorn shrubs sprout
there is one about getting stung by these blessed nettles
retrieving a ball and having picked up the fallen
all that gets swollen burgeons
true of clothes also woes
before it was stone then rock then dust then down the river gone
but the hungry worship the flow wash by the banks grow
then back to stone
what phenomena this love
what bludgeoning memory
the earth has promised me stillness of stones
returning all with the one face and repeating after louder
yet no more no less equal
but silent throughout

probhato kale kali kali

lights
lit in electricity
luminous in oil
this darkness invented
to celebrate lights
this darkness mixed
in our eyes
and to look deeper inside
lights
every once in a while
we are happy
we have seen lights
oh how lovely is this life
that it isnt blinding
all the time
lights
seeing or not
believing or not
hearing psalms and prayers
or not
in the darkness hiding
in the dark hide
the leper soul
the stump, the gash
and there await
lights


this life is certainly the waiting game. but look at me. sententious already and ive just found one gray hair really. at the barber's. that too deep inside in my scalp. i shaved it close and then in the mirror saw this one rogue strand. worrisome, but expected. but this life is the waiting game. and i mean life in general here; not my life. otherwise why would i say it. as i was saying, there cannot be a greater virtue than patience. for wanting and receiving, for giving and taking no greater art than patience. because that is all we are supposed to do. wait it out, wait for it. even when we are powerful we are not omnipotent; we are rarely blessed in our desperation. in all these cases, stripped of the elements of strength, broken by that which we are out to make, we deceive, ourselves, friends, lovers, police, government and god, for those who flatter to deceive. the easier option faced with lies is the long wait, the long march, the longing, peaceful longing, patience.

aliens and predators

ive gone from
orgasm to organism
a cog in the wheel
as the autonomous being
but this is a wild land
they wink
oh the cold wind in the evening
so inviting to quench
the thirst of parched
weather beaten mornings
so harsh on the skin
to live is to drink
in this parched rocky land
but yes the evening chill
there is peace
look or don't
or look and still do not
or wait
open your eyes slowly
breathe


advice. that inescapable outgrowth of experience, the irrepressible appurtenance of human existence (i would have said existence, but outside of bagheera ive known of no animals giving or receiving advice). but even if it were so that there was that little bit of friendly guidance, a small word of caution exchanged among animals, i would not think less of them for that. we all need to be advised; only the following it part is fuzzy and therefore its cool if we never did use it. there is an ideal world for you: coexisiting with the word to the wise the triggers of obstinacy. i havent had any truck with advice for as long as i can remember. but i havent been out like this either in the same timeframe. so no i didnt seek advice to come to hyderabad. but then i needed it. some said, just breathe, others thought i should just chill. not advice of the kind that puts you on your guard making it one kind of advice that is amenable. not the kind to make you wary but the type to make you put your guard down. i like that. just let go. good advice. "listen to me... let go". thanks, i will.